admin People breakup for some crazy and not so crazy reasons. Sadly, breakups occur even though the love is still alive. Relationships are comprised of many different elements and, unfortunately sometimes those elements can undermine, even destroy a relationship.
But She Said…
So, what is the answer to the question, “how can i get my ex girlfriend back?” If you personally have been involved in a break up, more than likely, you are the dumpee, and you may not even know exactly why you got dumped.
Because more often than not, the reason for you getting the old heave-ho, the reason they give you, is not the real reason for the breakup. So why can’t the dumper level with you? The reasons are varied. Sometimes it may be that they are taking the path of least resistance, They feel that you will accept the reason that they tell you, while the real reason could be any one of a dozen or two different reasons.
But since it’s almost a given that at the outset, you really don’t know the real reason for getting dumped, this reason alone, should be reason enough to let things cool off for a month or so, with no communication. In the interim, you may or may not discover the real reason for the break up.
And now, the Ever Popular–“I Don’t Love You Anymore”
That having been said, it is not uncommon to hear “I don’t love you anymore” as a reason for breaking up. When you stop to think about it, it’s an easy way out; (relatively speaking) requires very little in the way of an explanation.
On the other hand, saying “I love you but you act like a jerk, you criticize everything I do, you’re irresponsible, disrespectful, thoughtless, can’t even remember my birthday, rude, you seem to have no direction or goals in life, etc, etc… This can be emotionally draining, plus it opens the door to a long drawn out argument.
So to avoid all this, “I don’t love you anymore” gets the job done with the least amount of repercussion. If you have been a victim of “I don’t love you anymore”, it is very likely there were things you were in the habit of doing that were your undoing. Perhaps they were never discussed but may have been a constant source of irritation to that someone who is now your ex.
Only When You Are Really Gone Can You Be Appreciated
What to do? One fundamental rule for Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back, despite the urge, do not call, text, or otherwise try to contact your now ex for a minimum of 30 days.
This is an important point to keep in mind–trying to stay in communication with an ex has the opposite effect that you want. Only when there is no contact, can your ex fully realize you are gone, out of their life. Only then is there a sense of what they have lost, and what they miss about you.
(Hopefully, there are some positive things about you that they miss.)
At the same time, not communicating gives both of you time to reflect, and realize that you are not in each others lives. There may be a sense of absence, making the heart grow fond, and who knows, you may even discover the real reason for getting dumped. It shouldn’t be that hard to figure out the reason for the break up.
So Why the Break up?
There are usually clues. But even when you do discover the real reason for the split, you can’t go running back, pound on their door, and scream, “This was the REAL reason! Wasn’t it, Wasn’t it, Wasn’t it??”
Think back. Were there ongoing issues, or a major issue? You may need an attitude adjustment. Are you even tempered? Responsible? A person of Integrity?
How can I get my ex girlfriend back? Usually, coming across as diplomatic, sensitive, well prepared, knowing what you are going to say, and saying it in an assured manner always works better than the screaming lunatic approach.
Trying to get your ex girlfriend back, can and should be a learning experience for both you and the ex. One thing for sure. You can’t rely on gut feelings or intuition to get you through it. You need techniques and methods that have been proven effective, because you are probably only going to get one chance to get it right with your ex, so you want to make sure to go about it the right way.